I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendshop.

In the previous post, I remarked on one shopkeeper's disinclination to talk me into buying a hat, compared to "so many sales people [who] have nudged me beyond my initial resistance." But now that I think about it, I think there's a general difference between New York and San Francisco shopkeepers. The culture of shopkeeping is entirely different.

In New York, when you go into a nice store, a salesperson takes charge of your emotional experience. There is no aggressive sales talk, but that is what is so completely psychologically aggressive about it. You are being managed. You feel welcomed, befriended. Suddenly, a beautiful girlfriend (or boyfriend) is shopping with you, talking intelligently with you about the things you weren't really thinking of buying, getting you to feel that a normal part of this friendshop — oops, I mean friendship! — will be a discreet exchange of credit card for shopping bag. You walk out the door, fulfilled, and it won't be until later that you'll wonder why you bought something again. It's like these stores are hypnotizing me.

But that's New York. It's not like that in San Francisco. The people who work in the stores are hanging around, perhaps chatting with each other. They may notice you and say hi, but they don't envelop you and affect your mood. They'll be there to take your money if you choose to buy. But you're on your own. You can look around and leave, and it doesn't seem to matter. How very odd!

I mean, it seems odd to me because I've been under the spell of New York for 75 days.